Blind Girl’s Unique Taste for Fashion

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog.

In the title of this blog, as you can probably tell, it’s about fashion. The topic of fashion is not something I (usually) write about in my blog, (This is the first time I’m writing about it, but hopefully, not the last!). I don’t consider myself as someone who knows a lot about fashion. But, as a young adult woman, I will say the least: I do love fashion (I mean, who doesn’t?!), even though, I also don’t think of myself as fashionable, meaning, I don’t necessarily always catch up with the latest fashion trend and design on the market, but, I do consider myself as well-dressed.

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Me dressed in a Goth/punk top representing Visual Kei style in Fashion.

However, with the topic about fashion, this is going to be a little different. This is, a reveal and (or maybe a confession?) of me expressing my very HUGE and DEEP passion for unique/and subculture fashion.

 

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Me dressed in a cat-themed Gothic Lolita dress also mostly in black.  

And, you may be wondering: what do I mean by subculture fashion? There may be many kinds and forms of subculture fashion. But, the kinds in which I’m sharing with you here, it’s a fashion trend, particularly very popular in Japan called: Gothic Lolita Fashion, The Visual Style and Cosplay.

 

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Photo of me dressed in a typical gothic Lolita dress in black.

Gothic Lolita fashion, is a kind of subculture fashion, this fashion style adopts (a kind of) Edwardian/and Victorian era style of clothing, it often gives an impression of being “dolly” (particularly for women’s style). Gothic Lolita fashion have also (somewhat) played a part in Japanese pop culture, and is sometimes (but not always) associated with a movement in Japanese music called the Visual Kei (The Visual Style), which is a form of VERY expressive visual representation in clothing, make up, and hair style (creating an exaggerating ‘dark and demonic look’). To me, I would describe/and represent myself as a Gothic Lolita, and or simply as Goth(especially to go with the Visual Style). But FYI: Back in the days when I was VERY into and passionately express my subculture fashion look, I’d claim to be the “Gothic Queen.”

 

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Me cosplay as a music character named Hatsune Miku.

But, the story of my unique taste for fashion doesn’t end here. I also have another piece to share, that is, my love for cosplay. The term cosplay means costume play. Basically, it means dressing up in characters usually appeared in or from a Japanese anime (note: anime may be similar but is actually quite different from cartoons, or comics. And sometimes, especially in western society, people do dress up as cartoon or comic characters on Halloween or during comic conventions). Personally, I love seeing other people cosplay, and I have been a huge Japanese anime fan for a VERY long time. But, I sometimes feel slightly disappointed/and discouraged when I cosplay; because, I kind-of feel that I may have ‘destroyed’ the perfect image from the original anime. But, I still enjoy and find it fun to cosplay in characters I adore! And, having fun is so important in cosplaying!

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Me cosplay as another music character named Kagamine Rin.

 

After having shared with you this much about my passion and love for unique dress and fashion, you may ask: Do I really go out like this?! Well, the answer is: not usually, at least, I haven’t feel confident and comfortable enough to dress in subculture fashion and go out. There is something I haven’t told you about, and that is, since my Vision Loss acceptance journey I made about 2 years ago, I have been refraining myself from dressed in subculture fashion. There’re reasons for this. What I find about subculture fashion is that it stands out, a lot; which is true, because, it is different from the norm, so obviously, people will look, stare, and may even question why I dressed the way I did(this had happened to me in the past). And, because I am now visibly presenting myself as a blind person since I now use a white cane when I go out, that itself also stands out. So, I haven’t yet figure out a way to cope with two things that just seem to stand out so much! But, I’ve been trying my hardest to overcome this. I think, no one should be judged, just because they have a disability, or just because they dressed differently than the norm. But, this is going to be a process, a rather slow process to adjust. Now, I’m way more confident and comfortable in using the white cane, and it will be another process in getting use to dressed up in subculture fashion and find a “place” for where my white cane (my disability) fit into this image. Hopefully, someday sooner, I could find my confidence back and am able to comfortably and confidently present myself to the world the way I should and want to be presented!

So, this concludes today’s blog. Thank you so much for reading to the end.
And, most importantly, I hope now you’ve learned something new about me!

By: The Invisible Vision Project

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Difficult Days are a Reminder that Good Days are Coming

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog.

I hope you all are doing well!

As for me, to be honest, I haven’t been really well at all; and, I have probably (almost) forgotten what is like to feel well (but I am trying really hard to not think this way). For the past few days, since the mid of last week, to the weekend and up until now, I have been struggling A LOT due to health-related reasons…[this is also the longest time the struggle is persisting].

For this blog, it is very much just to document the moment and to make a reflection on dealing with bad days. And, I also have two quotes to share as well.

I am sure we all know, all of us have bad days, it doesn’t matter for what reasons: sometimes, it may be illness related, or, it may be emotion related; sometimes, it’s about school, and other times, it may be about work, or even just life in general. But, what I have learned about when going through bad days is, (and I think it’s very important): don’t beat yourself up! When you’re struggling or having a bad day, it is important to not dwell on the things you can’t do at the moment (this has been very difficult for me, as I always want or expect myself to be productive). But, from what I’ve learned, it is important to take care of yourself first, try to stay as positive as possible, and stay or talk with helpful and positive people around you; it will and may not necessarily make the struggle or pain to go away, but, it will really help a lot, especially emotionally.

So, it is safe to say, for the past few days, I practically didn’t do very much, other than hospital and clinic visits, and spending the rest of the hours being in bed. Of course, I was becoming very frustrated at times, I wanted to get over this pain and struggle as quickly as possible, but, my body just wasn’t willing to cooperate with me this time. This is when I realize, maybe it’s my ‘fault’ for pushing too hard, and went way over my limit. I know in the past, when I went through the same struggle (this is not the first time, in case you’re wondering, and definitely not the last), I have a tendency to order my body in such an attitude like “just get over this already!” But, for this time, it didn’t listen to my ‘order,’ which in turn, it’s a sign that I am getting weaker to combat with the struggle now (I admit, I have noticed this, but not necessarily willing to accept it until now).

22809766_10155838045364712_891412726_nTo describe how I have been feeling for the past few days, I have two quotes that I think best summarizes and describes my feelings. In this first quote, in which I have been wanting to say this for ages, and it says: “I can’t tell if it’s killing me or it’s making me stronger.” I think this quote is very on point of my experience with pain. During the moments when I was in so much pain, I began to question countless times in my head: what is all of this for? Why am I in so much pain? And why does pain has to be the testimony for my strength? In some instances, I somehow did wish that the pain should just kill me, so that I don’t have to endure it any longer. But, other thoughts were also on my mind, thoughts of joyous and happiness in life, and of moments spent with positive people in my life, and how thankful I am for them. It is in those moments that I tried to hold on to and not letting go, or giving up.

22782402_10155838044889712_1466061226_nAnd, in the second quote it reads: “You have to fight through some bad days to earn the best days of your life.” I think this quote is very right; I think, if I don’t fight through the difficult days, the days with pain and struggle, I won’t be really and truly living fully in the days when I’m free of struggle and of pain. Struggles are tough, but because of it, I am able to grow stronger as a person, so I don’t get defeated easily in life, because, at least, I  know the difference between a difficult and an easy life. I will cherish the good life, but continue to try and stay strong during hard times. And, I truly believe, even though it may take longer, but, things will eventually get better, and I will get better. So, just as the title of this blog says, Difficult Days are a Reminder that Good Days are Coming!

So, this concludes today’s blog. Thank you for reading to the end.

By: The Invisible Vision Project

 

 

 

I Love Tea Tag

Hello Everyone,

It’s been a LONG while since the last time I was tagged to do a Tag blog. And, there is no rules saying that I can’t write a tag blog, if I’m not being tagged for it! So, a couple of weeks ago on YouTube, I saw this tag, and I thought to myself- someday I must do this tag, since the simplest reason is: I REALLY LOVE TEA, A LOT!22500648_10155809494114712_1207184912_n

If you know me really well, you know that I love tea; I don’t just love tea, and I don’t just drink a LOT of tea every day, but I also collect tea, I also collect mugs, and other teaware as well. I’m also showcasing my current tea collection->image on the right. Looking at this collection, I didn’t think I have this many kinds of tea until I dig and lay them all out in an open space!

And, if you also happens to be a tea lover, I think you’ll be interested in reading this post! So let’s get into the Questions:

1). What is your favorite tea?

My all time favorite tea is a Japanese green tea called Genmaicha, it is green tea with roasted brown rice. My second favorite is London Fog, which is a Earl Grey Tea Latte.

2). What is the worst tea you’ve ever tried?

I don’t think I ever had a worst experience with tea. But, I will say, some pure teas (green tea or black tea) don’t taste good if you put too much in it, it will create a bitter taste, so I guess that itself is bad enough!

3). What is your favorite tea cup/mug? Show us!

22501056_10155809494339712_1323859217_nHere, I have a picture of two of my favorite mugs, one says “Dalian,” on this mug, it is a Starbucks City Mug. This mug is very special to me, I got it during my summer trip to China, and Dalian is my hometown in China. And, the second mug says “My friend is Bold Blind and Beautiful.” I got this mug from a friend, and this mug is also very meaningful to me.

 

4). Are you drinking tea now? If so, what kind?

Yes! I am drinking tea from Davids Tea and it’s called Me to We tea. It’s Davids Tea’s collaboration with a very awsome organization called Me to We. This is a fruit blend caffeine free tea, and I love it!

5). What was your most recent tea purchase?

I recently purchased tea from Davids Tea, and I got two kinds of tea: Matcha “Matsu” which is a Matcha (powdered green tea); and, because it’s the Fall season, I got a Pumpkin Chai tea as well, everything is pumpkin related in the fall season!

6). Do you prefer lose-leaf or tea bags?

I like tea bags better, but some tea only come with lose-leaf, in that case, I use a tea filter to filter out my tea, because I really don’t like the idea of ‘eating’ my tea!

7). Do you prefer caffeinated or decaf?

I like decaf better, especially for black tea, which I sometimes try to avoid. Caffeine affects my sleep pattern, which is not really nice.

8). Do you add anything to your tea?

I usually don’t, especially, I drink a lot of fruit blend tea, it doesn’t need a lot of sweetener. But, if I’m having for instance, Earl Grey, then I’ll add milk/or cream and sugar!

9). Where is your favourite place to order a tea?

I don’t usually order tea outside very often. I prefer to go buy tea from a store that sells tea (like Davids Tea, or Teavana). But I guess, I like any place that can get me a London Fog, because that’s usually what I get if I get one from a coffee/tea shop.

10). Show us 3 teas we should try!

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This is a really tough one, because I really have more tea that I want to recommend to you all. But, if only to pick 3, I would definitely recommend my favorites: Japanese Genmaicha (photo on the left side) is the first, Just Peachy (top right) from Davids Tea is the second, and, Peppermint(bottom right) would be the third!

 

 

 

So, this concludes this tag and the blog, I hope you enjoyed reading it!
By: The Invisible Vision Project

Accept and Know Your Limits 

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog. 

Today, I want to have a conversation with you about limitations. Yes, believe me, we all have limitations. It doesn’t matter how strong of a person you are, in life, there’ll always be things that we can do, and things that we can’t do. 

Most of us are probably familiar with the expression, especially when we’re faced with things we can’t do, people around us often say, “don’t beat yourself up,” and no matter how many times we hear it, there’ll always be people who do end up “beating themselves up.” And, I happened to be one of those kind of people.

In the past, especially when I was younger, I didn’t know my limitations well enough, or rather, I didn’t want to know or to accept those limitations I have. I felt that, if I show my limitations in front of people, it’s like showing weakness. So, for a very long time, I had been hiding in a nutshell and silently pushing forward, without acknowledging my limits and know when to stop. Some people saw me as this “always on the go” and “always pushing on” or “never seem to stop” type of person. On the one hand, it might be good to be busy, and be this “always on the go” or “pushing on” type, it also kind of shows a person’s strong characteristic( from the outside). But, in reality, that’s actually very stressful and tiring, because I don’t allow or give myself a break!

Then, when things in life started to change about 2 years ago, first with the vision loss acceptance, then followed with the mental and physical health acceptance/challenges, I was in a position where I had to make necesssary adjustments to re-learn how to live my life, that, of course includes- accept and know my limits, which is huge, and I’m still in this learning process. 

So, what I can share with you from my accept and know your limit journey is that, it actually feels really good to know your limits, it’s not disabling but rather quite the opposite! It allowed me at least, to know when I’m able to do things, I put the time and energy into the task, I stay focused and do my work with the best ability I could. Then, if I’m not able to do things at a certain time, for whatever reason, I allow myself for a time-off and not feeling guilty about it, meaning, not to “beat myself up” for it. And, when I’m well rested and have recharged my energy, I continue on with the work I left off. So, you could say, I’ve tried and learned to establish a work& rest balance! And, this has been helping me a lot. But, occasionally, I still do have moments where I couldn’t get the planned tasks done in the time I wanted, and the self-criticism voice comes on, when that time comes, I try my best to push that voice away, it’s not easy, but I continue to try. In life, it’s all about learning to know what’s work for you and what’s not, life itself is a continuous learning process! 

Thus, this concludes today’s blog post. I hope you enjoyed reading this and had some take-away from it. Thank you for reading to the end! 
By: The Invisible Vision Project 

‘Tis the Back to School Season Again…

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog.

As soon as September approaches, most of us already know what that means-it’s back-to-school season! (We all know this, whether we’re a student, or a parent, or even neither!). For me, it seemed like I’ve been in school like FOREVER! Well, this statement is kind of true, if you do the math, I’ve actually been in school for just about 20 years! (now, that is a LONG time!). Well, there’re a number of reasons for this.

In today’s blog, I want to first share with all of you my schooling experience (from the beginning up until now…). To start off, I went to school at a very late age. So, I first started grade one at the age of 7. Then, when I came to Canada at 14, I was supposed to be in high school, but I didn’t, I stayed back a year; and, I also stayed one extra year in high school. So, when I came to university, I was already 20. And, I spent 5 years in university to study my first undergraduate degree in History; and now, I’m on my second undergraduate degree in Gender Studies (the reason for this, if you’re interested to hear about the story, it’ll be for another blog!). So, this is where I am right now. Honestly, I will say that my experience with school was never easy, since the very first day in grade one; I also remembered that I think I almost peed my pants in grade one, because I was so shy, timid, and scared of being away from my parents (note that I never really attended kindergarten or pre-school); and, I also experienced bullying in the early years of my schooling. On the other hand, I also remembered that I almost always had a good relationship with my teachers, I think I may have thought of my teachers as a parental figure, so that I could feel calm and secure at school. Or you could even say I’m just lucky to have good teachers!

Alright, enough with the talk on my past schooling experience. I also want to talk about this upcoming year (which starts TOMORROW!!!!). To be honest, I’m actually very excited for this year, since the time I started planning out my timetable and up until now, I almost immediately know that this will be a GOOD year! I’m very interested in the courses and the materials that I’ll be studying this year, and that I’m already familiar with the instructors that will be teaching me (this is always good and important!). However, this doesn’t mean that I’m worry-free. For one thing that makes me worry a lot for sure is my very unstable health situation, and because it is uncertain, and I have no control over it, it makes doing things, or even doing nothing harder. Certainly, I wouldn’t be like just because I have these challenges or difficulties in life, I’m going to sit at home and do nothing, because, as I said, even doing nothing won’t help, so I might as well do something I like (and going to school is something I enjoy very much!). So, you can probably tell, there’re both positive and negative about going to school this year. Even so, I’m super glad that I still get to go to school, and that I still get to study what I enjoy studying, I’m going to stay positive and say: This is going to be a good year and I’m so looking forward to it!

So, this concludes today’s blog. Thank you for reading to the end!
Good luck to those who’re also starting school!

By: The Invisible Vision Project

Dear Positive People in My Life

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog.

In today’s blog, as you can probably already tell by the title, this is going to be a blog, well, it’s more like a Letter that I’m writing to all the positive people I met in my life.

To be honest, I have A LOT to say to each and every one of the positive people that have appeared in my life, because of you, you’ve turned my often messy, chaotic, and troubled life around, you’ve changed it in such a drastic way (of course, in a VERY positive way!).

So, I would like to begin by saying “Thank you.” Thank you for having appeared in my life. No matter for what reason that we met,(and I believe this is definitely god’s guidance). I thank you for getting to know me, and to know about my life.

And, of course, I’m always thankful for all of your support, be it physically giving me a helping hand when I needed or giving me emotional support by cheering me on, especially in some of the most desperately needed moments of my life. Thank you for giving me the resources, and support; thank you for being a guidance, and thank you for your understanding, and the willingness to listen to my concerns, hearing my cries and pains.

In addition to hearing my concerns, I also thank you for believing in me, especially when I had moments where I no longer believed in myself anymore. Thank you for giving me the courage and strength to stand up when I felt that giving up seemed like a better option. And, thank you for educating me the importance of being patient.

All in all, I know this is not enough to express how thankful I am. But, I will conclude just by saying: I am forever thankful and grateful to have you in my life, and thank you for joining my positive team, and my Happy People Team!

This concludes today’s blog. Thank you for reading to the end!

By: The Invisible Vision Project

 

Traveling in China& Home Sweet Home!

Hello Everyone,

Welcome to The Invisible Vision Project’s Blog.

It’s been a long while since I last blogged, the reason for that is because I was away for almost an entire month in July. I was on vacation in China with my family, traveling and visiting relatives that are living there.

Some of you may not know this, since I never really talked about it yet on this blog. I was born and mostly raised in China. At the age of 14, I moved to Canada, and I’ve been living in Canada for almost 13 years now. But,  since the time I left China, I never went back to visit, so it really has been a LONG time!

In today’s blog, I want to share with you about my experience of visiting China- both the good, and the bad. This will probably be a very long blog post, so be prepared, and maybe, grab a snack and something to drink would help! First of all, the one thing…or probably two things I want to say about China is: TOO hot and TOO many people! This is not really a surprise, because China has a huge population; and as for the hot weather, from what I heard, this year is just a bit unusual; but, it’s still definitely more humid there than where I live now.

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Photo Description: Me standing in an open area, the front entrance of The Forbidden City is behind me.

I visited two cities in China on this trip- Beijing, China’s capital, and, the City of Dalian, which is where I was born. I stayed in Beijing and visited a total of 3 places: The Forbidden City, The Great Wall of China, and The Summer Palace. To be honest, I’ve been to The Forbidden City once, that was when I was 7, since a long time had passed, so it was a good experience to revisit. But, climbing The Great Wall of China was NOT so easy; although, I wouldn’t really call it ‘climbing,’ because, I sat on a cable-car that carry tourists up to the mountain, and I only needed to climb about one ‘floor’ (which took about 20 minutes, there’re a total of 7 ‘floor’ in that area). But, because the road surface is very uneven, since it was built a LONG TIME ago (no consideration on accessibility!), for a blind girl, this was VERY DIFFICULT! And, the trip to The Summer Palace was OK, it’s a lot of sightseeing, since what it is is just a never-ending garden! It will really take a long time to visit all of the gardens inside it, so that didn’t happen (visiting one was already tiring), but the view was indeed really pretty!

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Photo Description: Me posing at The Great Wall of China.

 

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Photo Description: Me Posing in front of ‘Friendship Square’ in Dalian, China.

Now, here comes the most important part of this travel: Going Home Sweet Home! I’ve mentioned at the beginning of this blog,  I left my hometown in China about 13 years ago; so, this visit is very important to me, to revisit my hometown, and to visit my grandparents and relatives that are still living there. The day I arrived in the City of Dalian was very emotional, I could not hold back the tears, and the first thing I said after arriving was: “I’m finally home.” While I was in Dalian, I had the opportunity to visit some places, especially places that are meaningful to me, like: the old apartment that I used to live, my last school that I attended; and, of course, I visited Dalian’s downtown area, The Sunasia Ocean World (which is known as the biggest Aquarium in Asia), and, the seaside, because one of Dalian’s biggest tourist attraction in the summer is the beach, since Dalian is surrounded by the sea!

 

 

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Photo Description: Me standing in front of one of the oldest shopping centre in Downtown Dalian.

Overall, I will say that I had a great experience of visiting China, (despite the extreme humidity!). And, I had a lot of fun sightseeing and spent time with relatives that I haven’t seen in a long time. But, some of the things in China that did get on my nerve, one being: safety issues. I had so much anxiety when crossing streets/intersections in China, simply because there’re no stop signs, and for some intersections, there’re even NO TRAFFIC LIGHTS! People are rushing, cars are rushing, and that made me, as a person with Visual Impairment VERY CONFUSED AND DIFFICULT to cross roads. And, the second thing that bothered me a lot was: people are so not considerate, they’re rather ignorant. I am a White Cane user, but people act like they can’t see me, when clearly, they should and can see better than I can see them! But, I will say, there was this ONE time, someone saw me getting on the subway, stood up and gave her seat to me, I was actually a little surprised by that, but that only happened once. Overall, I will say that I had a great experience of visiting China, (despite the extreme humidity!). And, I had a lot of fun sightseeing and spent time with relatives that I haven’t seen in a long time. But, some of the things in China that did get on my nerve, one being: safety issues. I had so much anxiety when crossing streets/intersections in China, simply because there’re no stop signs, and for some intersections, there’re even NO TRAFFIC LIGHTS! People are rushing, cars are rushing, and that made me, as a person with Visual Impairment VERY CONFUSED AND DIFFICULT to cross roads. And, the second thing that bothered me a lot was: people are so not considerate, they’re rather ignorant. I am a White Cane user, but people act like they can’t see me, when clearly, they should and can see better than I can see them! But, I will say, there was this ONE time, someone saw me getting on the subway, stood up and gave her seat to me, I was actually a little surprised by that, but that only happened once.

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Photo Description: Me posing in the water (the seaside), a faded island is behind me.

 

 

To conclude, overall,  I had a good quality of time visiting China. I would love to go back and visit again, probably in a few years. But, I probably didn’t say this, and I will say it now: the 13 or so hours of flying was not so pleasant at all. My body, with an unstable and concerning heart condition, it had begun to act up about 9 hours into the flight. I’m just glad that I made it through, both ways. And, if someone is able to invent a faster way of going to China from North America, I will really appreciate that and probably would go back more often!

So, this concludes today’s blog. Thank you for reading to the End!

By: The Invisible Vision Project